Productive day…

After my post last night I couldn’t sleep. I knew part of the reason was because I was anxious over an interview I had today. So, to help ease my anxiety and to increase my feelings of capability I cut out material for a skirt and a shirt that I would sew to wear for my interview today. Before I went to bed I pinned the pieces together as much as possible so that I could easy zip through the sewing in the morning.

When I woke up I took a shower and then sat to sew my outfit. I’ve been having arguments with my sewing machine but I after I pulled out my old machine and discovered I didn’t know where the power cord was I went ahead and used my newer (rather cranky) machine. Things were going along fine until I was at the end of sewing my shirt. Suddenly the tension went a little nuts and I couldn’t get it to flatten out. I opened the machine and a pin, that had been bent when the needle hit it and broke a minute before, bent a small piece of metal that the thread loops around before catching the bobbin and being released. SIGH. I bent it back and continued to sew. Not only did the tension not reset the machine now makes a twanging noise when the thread releases from the little metal piece. Tomorrow morning I’m going to have to call and get the machine worked on again.

To still be able to wear my shirt (It looked so good!) I pulled out the safety pins and made the shirt wearable. I was so scared it would fall apart while I wore it. LOL! The interview went really well and now all I have to do is wait until Friday to hear back. Fingers, toes, and eyes crossed!

When I got home I ate a little lunch and then sat down to write. And write I did! I realized that I had forgotten to pick something up so at 850pm I ran out to get something I needed for tomorrow. Phew! Productive and active day!

When I sat down to write this post I thought back over the day and discovered that I took pride in what I did today. My want to bring intent back into my life has begun. Although I was in a rush and had to hurry to get to my interview on time I enjoyed the process of the chaos that took me from my apartment to the office. I completed the tasks I had for myself today and invested myself in the completion of them. That made me feel good inside. I strive to continue this accomplishment tomorrow.

Pounds lost: 12.5 (376.5)

Daily insight: Safety pins are a life saver!

Ounces of water consumed: 64

Steps in the right direction: 45

Intent…

The word intent has been coming up a lot for me lately. I find it in reading, I find the necessity of using it in writing, I find it popping up in conversations. Why? What is it about this word that I’m being told to look for?

I know that I’m the kind of person that intends to do things. I always intend to complete the writing assignments I have. And eventually I do, but it’s usually cutting it close to the deadlines. I intend to do dishes and then get caught up in doing something else. I intend to rake the leaves, but it rains on that day. I intend to do a lot of things that don’t always get done.

Perhaps that’s the key. Intent is not the same thing as intend. When you intend to do something you have it in mind and even have plans for it. That doesn’t mean you complete it or even make good those plans. But intent is different. Intent is the other side of the words meaning. To have intent is to do something with a specific purpose in mind.

A few days ago I wrote about how when you’re pagan you do things with intent and create change through the force of your will.

I haven’t been doing that at all. I’ve been going through the motions but not feeling anything when I do it. I can sit here at my desk trying to write and I find myself with my chin in my hand completely bored with what I’m supposed to be interested in. This is no way to do things. I wrote an article about Zen tea drinking meditations and I realized that I never did any of the things I talked about. Not any more. I used to revel in the feeling of things. In the motions.

As I write this I’m starting to think that perhaps this is part of the journey I’m on. This realization of what I used to do compared to what I do now. I need to do everything with intent, as I once did. I need to go outside and be amazed by the different colors of grey and blue the sky has. I need to enjoy the motions of what I do to see the beauty in the shuffling of my feet or bounce in my step. I should see the action for what it will bring, what it causes, and then watch and feel the reaction.

Move through life with intent.

Pounds lost: 12.5 (376.5)

Daily insight: There’s beauty in the simple act of walking across a room.

Ounces of water consumed: 80

Steps in the right direction: 44

The small things in life…

Yesterday was the “Not Thanksgiving” Thanksgiving party at my parent’s house. It was wonderful! I love being able to spend time with my family and yesterday was a great example of a good time. The food was amazing (Oooh, the twice baked potatoes were insanely nummy!) and I was surprised into laughter with a gift. I was handed a tin placard that had Glenda from the Wizard of Oz on it. The catch phrase printed across her picture read, “Are you a good witch or a bad witch?”

It made me laugh so hard I had tears in my eyes. It was a wonderful (priceless) gift that I treasure! I’m going to put it up here in my office so every time I see it I will grin or laugh or both. It’s really the small things in life that matter. They become the focus of memories that make you feel the same joy you did when they first happened.

Today I went back to work on my freelance jobs and had a very busy day. I’m really enjoying the work I’m getting to do and all of the research that leads up to the end product. Today my articles were centered on different types of meditation.

One of the forms of meditation I researched is called Sufi Whirling. Have you ever seen a Whirling Dervish? This is the type of meditation that they perform when whirling. I was fascinated about the logic used in the meditation. For example, when you spin without stepping out to far you stay in nearly the same place.. this draws in your center of gravity so that your center stays in one place even though your body is in motion. It reminded me of the point you see at the end of a water funnel. A finite point within the chaos of motion.

They believe that the energy created in the whirling that is focused on your center opens up your natural spiritual self so that you can communicate with the divine.

I like the thought of this because I remember very clearly twirling as a child until I fell down dizzy and ecstatic on the ground with my arms thrown out staring up into the bright blue sky. I would laugh and get up to do it again. There was bliss to be found in my childish twirling. Doing it with a intent and focus could very well be the way to throw the doors open to speaking with the divine consciousness.

I believe that meditation is often used as a form of prayer. Prayer, by definition, is spiritual communication with God/Goddess. Therefore meditation is an excellent way to focus your intent on communication. In the pagan belief everything we do should be done with intent, most especially our spell craft. So meditation will be a valuable tool in focusing our intent in our every day life.

Balance is something I’ve talked about before when I mentioned balancing the elements within yourself. Having too much fire could get you into trouble when emotions are concerned, for example. Balance is important in as many aspects of your life as possible.

When you meditate you achieve a balance within your body as well as your spiritual self. With balance in your life you look at the world differently and in a more positive way.

Pounds lost: 12.5 (376.5)

Daily insight: Enrich your life through the thoughtful use of intent.

Ounces of water consumed: 64

Steps in the right direction: 37